Negotiation practices, food for thought and hacks
I’ve been regularly following Ben (Benoit) Lecomte‘s incredible 190 day-long swim through plastic-filled Pacific Ocean. Incredible heroic human achievement, priceless scientific research on consequences of Fukushima radioactive polution and an exploration of the Great Pacific Garbage Patch. Thanks to the Longest Swim team, we have a clear picture of the devastating impact on nature our so called “progress” has brought.
Here is Ben’s gruesome summary of his findings.
author unknown
Remember my cat, the greatest negotiator ever?
He could open any door and get what he wanted effortlessly. Well, he was ran over by a car last week-end.
And I guess there is a lesson to be learnt from this awfull tragedy: No matter how great you are at what you do, the reality is like a truck. It will run you over one day if you don’t pay attention.
Lots of articles written about this topic. Emotions make you blind. You deliver “I-have-a-dream” sort of speech and think that you won the heart of your counterpart, then you get frustrated seing that your emotional tirade bounced off the wall, so you start boiling. 🙂
My advice, be yourself! If you shout on your counterpart, apologize and carry on. If you are nervous, pause, explain the nature of your behavior, let your counterpart understand. Don’t be afraid of emotions. Once you cool down and can clearly think, make a recap together so that in your passion you’re not carried away too far.
When you leave the table make sure that all parties have the same version of the event, the result is well noted and follow-up actions planned.
2nd row 5th from the left. Practice (a lot)
Where is your client? Still queuing to be served? Confused, intimidated, lost? Then change, transform, evolve before it’s too late.
Love, spoil, surpirse your client.
Your client is a magnet, she can attract or repel many new ones.
Lessons learned this week:
– Think about the pictures in the heads of people you negotiate with.
– Conscientiousness is a great personality trait that would support your personal and professional lives should you develop it
– The speed of macro and micro business environment changes forces us to adapt and improve daily
… and yes, Salah is faster then the ball 🙂
I’ve received this message from a friend, who’s happy to have finally signed an agreement with one of his key customers. He works for a multinational corporation, his company is a global market leader and yet, at each negotiation campaign he risks it all. Sounds familiar?
Balance of power is essential in each negotiation process. A junior athlete or a young actor risk signing a contract with a predatory agent. A graduate is most likely to be overworked and underpaid. Why? Because they are on the wrong side of the power scales. They have no leverage in negotiations. What will they lose in case of a non-agreement? Can they afford it?
What would you lose in your situation? Can you walk away without an agreement? What can you offer? How unique are you or your product? And what about your counterpart? Can they afford a non-agreement? Some cases are definitely take-it-or-leave-it. There is no negotiation on the terms&package for the twenty-year-olds. There is no negotiation for a B-brand with the top retailer.
But yet most cases are show-must-go-on! A compromise must and will be found and business will continue.
“I’ll face it with a grin
I’m never giving in
On, with the show”!
Queen
The topic that started bothering me recently is this new fast-food sort of knowledge sharing system that pops up here and there online as the newly discovered truth. Continue reading “7 Habits”
Thomas-Kilmann model is widely misunderstood.
First, it’s a behavioral model, not a guide to conflict resolution. Then, it has nothing to do with win-win, lose-lose etc.
The only possible positive solution for both parties of the conflict lies in collaborating area. When both input high levels of assertiveness and cooperativeness. “Growing the pie”.
Competing provokes deeper conflict. My way or the highway approach, when submission by force is in no way a solution at all. Playing the muscles is a “lose-lose” too.
And finally, compromising, the cornerstone of modern European ideology is nothing but “lose-lose”.
An interesting book on this subject was written by the FBI hostage negotiator Chris Voss, “Never Split the Difference”. I recommend.
A great message picked-up this week-end from “Beyond Reason”.
Treat your negotiation opponent as a Triple A STAR!
Ok, ok, the acronym is mine.
So triple A stands for “Appreciation”, “Affiliation”, “Autonomy” and the STAR stands for STAtus and Role.
These are the key feelings that can take a friend to foe and vice versa. These are the buttons that wrongly pushed would ruin your negotiations. Beware of them!
Oftentimes we get frustrated when our counterpart does not meet our requests, we tend to ignore the hours of preparations and alignments they had to do within their organisations in order to improve their offer #X. A simple appreciation of someone’s hard job will help you turn the war cabinet into the professional meeting. To lower the degree and to start building positive emotional background well needed to motivate your counterpart to keep working on yet another offer!
Affiliation, is part of our defense mechanism. To take a person out alone and expose her/him is the worst humiliation. Remember about the team spirit being cultivated in your organisation? Well, be sure that your counterpart is part of the same culture. Don’t humiliate your counterparts by comparing them to their (better) predecessors or their (ideal) bosses. The person in front of you is the best partner you’ve got. Treat this person as part of the world’s best elite! (which by the way, can be actually true )
Autonomy. Never doubt person’s skills or capabilities to solve issues, get the right answers, improve the offer. For you and me, it is better to do our job properly, to bring all to conclusion. Isn’t it why we are hired? Stop panicking by asking to see the superior if something doesn’t go right the first time. Give person some autonomy. It will be appreciated, it will help you too.
Status. So what is it that you can lose if you will meet your counterpart personally and treat them with a cup of coffee? If you meet at your office, the person had probably started his/her day very early, had to take a train or an airplane. Treat them better, care for their hardships. Praise them for the time they invest in you, otherwise next meeting will be only by the phone J. Simple curtesy can change the outcome of your negotiations.
Role. Support your counterpart personal involvement and achievements within his/her own organization. Advocate for them. Compliment them in front of their superiors. Do not undercut them. Build your relations with the person and keep them after the project is long done.
Build bridges, don’t burn them (an advice to myself too)!
Good luck with your next Triple A STAR!
